Jimmy Page to prevent Fall Out Boy from Destroying Rock
The Onion reported that Fall Out Boy’s Honda Civic Tour will officially ‘Suck the remaining lifeblood from all that still rocks.’ Only one thing can bring Rock back from the brink. And that, my friends, is a never-before-released guitar riff from none other than Jimmy Page.
The Protectors of Rock decided to only release the ALL POWERFUL riff during a time of extreme crisis. When it appears that all might be lost. The day of reckoning is upon us!!
You can help prevent the Rockopalypse by demanding more Rock and Metal on the airwaves. Fall Out Boy’s army of rock-hating ass clowns is a powerful one — Lead by the Dixie Chicks and James Blunt. Don’t under-estimate our enemy.
You can read more about the riff and the movement to protect Rock here.
“The Guardians said recent developments in the music world, such as the unaccountable popularity of the Dixie Chicks and Sufjan Stevens, have created a “perfect storm of lameness” from which rock might never recover.”…freakin’ awesome!
Thank the Lords of Rock for taking precautions in this manner!